Do Internships Extend Student Visas?

As I've said before, on internships young people do for free jobs that would otherwise go to paid workers, in violation of the Fair Labor Standards Act.  Casually perusing Craigslist will prove that this is truest in the creative professions, including marketing.

 I felt sorry for the young college students and grads so desperate for jobs that they would work for free as “interns”.  And for their parents, paying for an education during which their kids toil like slaves for college credit.

Maybe, though, not all those laboring unpaid are penniless students.  I recently found an internship position that stated, “Must be authorized to work in this country, we will not endorse F-Status.”

Perhaps some of those interns are extending their US student visas by taking nominal “jobs.”  If so, those students and their “employers” are jumping through a loophole called Optional Practical Training (OPT).  The United States Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS) permits graduate students and undergraduates who have completed or who have been pursuing their degrees for more than nine months with F-1 status to work in the US for at most one year on their student visas without needing to acquire a work H-1B visa.

A year’s a long time—time enough to gain work experience, to acquire an H1-B visa, to get married, and to keep the paycheck away from skilled native workers.

In that case I feel less sorry for those students and their parents.  Keeping American jobs out of American hands is both shameful and short-sighted.  Of course, I have a dog in this race.  I want those jobs--but I don't want to work for free.

(To be fair, don't blame Craigslist for this problem.  Craigslist is based in California, where positions that violate the FLSA are illegal.  Craigslist's official policy is that they are not allowed in its classified ads.  Officially, it requests all users to flag off the bad ads.)

LinkedIn Expertise

I’m now an “internet marketing expert” on LinkedIn. 

Here’s what happened:  I visited LinkedIn Answers. I answered another user’s question: how she could get her team to promote her email newsletter? That was easy; I rattled off a few ways that I would have promoted my own newsletter in a perfect world. 

The asker chose mine as “best answer.”   That means I now have an “expert” badge on my profile.

Annoyingly, some people who ask LinkedIn questions never close the loop by choosing the “best answer.”

One fellow asked where he could get print copies of Miss Clairol ads from the 1960s.  Several people sent him to URLs where he could have printed low-res copies.  I actually spent dozens of minutes on eBay tracking down actual ads and even packaging.  I enjoyed it, and I fully expected that he would acknowledge my work by awarding me the “best answer.”  Two months later, he still hasn’t chosen a best answer.

In fact, about 80% of the askers whose questions I’ve answered never select a “best answer.”  Some generous LinkedIn members answer questions because they want to share their knowledge.  Or because they want the links back to their own websites.  But many people like me answer questions because they want that “expert” badge and the ego gratification that goes with it.

So I emailed LinkedIn.  They don’t follow up with askers who don’t close their questions, and they don’t plan to.

If I really, really wanted the badge, and strangers really, really didn’t want to select best answers, there would be a dishonest solution: a “best answer exchange.” 

1. My friend Jimmy Doakes asks a question; I answer it.  Jimmy picks my answer as “best.” 
2.  I ask a question.  Jimmy’s friend Shruti answers it.  I pick Shruti’s answer.
3.  Shruti poses a question.  Jimmy answers.  Shruti picks Jimmy.

Note that I pose this scenario in the subjunctive.  I wouldn’t actually set up an exchange, of course.  It would degrade the value of my precious “best answer” badge.

One thing’s for sure: if I’ve thought of it, someone else is already doing it.  Just sayin’.

Copywriting Prostitutes

My favorite clients are the ones whose writing skills are undistinguished, whose writing doesn't reflect their other accomplishments.  They appreciate good writers.  They may ask for minor rewrites, but on the whole we get along well.  They’re pleased, and they say so.  They pay on time.  We both walk away happy.

Then there are the ones who write decently.  They believe that they could do the work themselves.  Some of them could.  As a result, they don’t really value my services.

And there are the ones who patronize the furtive writers who stand on the corners in mini skirts and fishnet stockings.  These pros shame themselves by writing academic essays for lazy students who’ve probably spent too much time playing beer pong or otherwise disporting themselves.

For example

Just ask the Doc…

If you are looking for help with your academic work, you have come to the right place. I have helped hundreds of students just like you. My high quality work is always on time.

I am a Phd and a Harvard Graduate. Outside of running my own business, I freelance in academic writing and take on about 3 new clients each week. Many of my clients are repeat customers who know they can rely on me to get the job done. 

• I am an expert in APA, MLA and Chicago formatting.
• I have written dissertations, theses, capstones, literature reviews and research papers.
• I can take on rush assignments with a turn-around time of less than 24 hours.
• My rates are reasonable and include unlimited revisions.

There is no project too big or too small. Please give me a call today: (phone number) or email me at (email address)

No exaggeration.  I copy/pasted "Doc's" ad.  “Doc” is too lazy to type an apostrophe ("If you are looking"), or to capitalize properly ("PhD," and "Harvard Graduate").  Is the "shift" key so hard to reach with that left little finger?

Yet his or her work is probably better than his or her clients’. The clients are probably grateful.  The problem is that "Doc's" writing penalizes students who attend college to learn, who turn in less-than-perfect papers, and who seek honest feedback from professors.  “Doc’s” clients graduate and find that they can’t write worth a bucket of warm spit.  They become my grateful clients.

In the meantime, “Doc” cheats students and educators simultaneously.  Hope they're wearing protection.  “Doc” is a prostitute among copywriters, degrading us all. 

Advertising: Good, Bad, Creepy

When I went out leafleting last weekend, I saw three kinds of outdoor advertising: good, bad, and creepy.

When it comes to elections and Hallowe’en, it pays to advertise.  Hence, many lawns were decorated with pumpkins, skeletons, tombstones and political yard signs.

As to the election, “my” side, opposing selling New Providence’s largest park to Union County for $1, got the yard signs and the votes out early.  Somehow a “vote yes” sign appeared next to my “no county park” sign the day after the elections.  I suppose that was from someone sore that New Providence rejected the sale 2:1.

As to Hallowe’en, our house failed to advertise this year.  Advertising is very important.  Even though trick or treat day fell on a Sunday, only two children showed up to claim their treats.  This was not entirely bad; we got to eat all the chocolate ourselves.

The creepy advertisement was the house with the newspapers in the driveway, three FedEx stickers on the door and the door hanger from the week before on the knob.

If the owners had merely moved away, they must have been so sinister and unfriendly they couldn’t convince anyone to take care of their entrance.  As it was, the entire front of their house was an invitation to burglars to swoop in off the highway, break a window and help themselves.

On the other hand, maybe the owners were dead and mouldering inside.  That would have been appropriate for Hallowe’en. 

I decided not to leave my bright green brochure at the door to further advertise the vacancy within.  In fact, I picked up the newspapers in the driveway, too.  But, come on, neighbor.  If you advertise the fact that your house is ripe for a break-in, you put mine at risk, too.

Hallowe’en advertising, great.  Political advertising, great, even if you don’t agree with me.  “Nobody home” advertising, reprehensible and creepy.